Bangkok was interesting.   I ended up staying on the famous Khao San Road, which is sorta like Bangkok’s Bourbon Street.  Location was good, and was able to visit much of the city.

I learned right away to be careful about Tuk-Tuk drivers (drivers of these two-stroke three wheel open-air taxis) and ‘touts’ (’friendly’ locals who often claim to be university teachers, but actually give you a lot of false, self-serving information).   Tuk-Tuk drivers are fairly pushy, and can be tough to get them to take you exactly where you want to go.  The entire tourism industry here is propped up by semi-official looking people and business that charge orders of magnitude more to unknowing ‘farang’ (foreigners).  ‘Touts’ are a bit more heinous, as they are outright dishonest.  If you’re walking towards an entrance to a Wat/Temple they will inform you that the Wat is closed, or open only to Buddhists.   This information seems reasonable, because usually they hang out near one of a Wat’s closed gates (typically only one entrance gate is open).

Other scams to watch out for is the T.A.T (Tourism Authority of Thailand) offices, which are just travel agents and are not actually affiliated with the government (beyond perhaps a license).  I was looking at booking a bungalow in Phuket, and discovered that the rates they charge are 2-3 time the actual cost.

Another thing to watch out for is if you instruct a Tuk-Tuk driver to take you to a specific pier for a water taxi.  They drop you off at what is, technically, a pier, but is actually a 100 meters or so away from the real, government run pier.  The rates for a ride on the unofficial boat is 1800 baht ($50), while an official one is only 18 baht (60 cents).  100 times the price.  The government folks actually will show you pictures of the real boats so that you don’t fall for this scam, but it is tricky.  Typically if it sounds expensive, it is.

Other navigation pitfalls, etc: With tuk-tuk drivers negotiate up-front, and it should not be more thatn 50 baht for pretty much anywhere.  Normal Taxi drivers will try to negotiate a fee up front, but is about a quarter of the cost if you insist on the meter rate.  Frankly you can’t beat the metered rate of an air-conditioned taxi, pretty much is always cheaper and more pleasant than the Tuk-Tuks.

I’m not usually one for regulation, but I think that Thailand could do a lot for their image and make even more tourism dollars if they required all Tuk-Tuks and Taxis to use meters at all times (like western cities), and crack down on the scammers.  There is a saying that you can shear a sheep many times but you can only skin it once–I think a lot of people visit Bangkok and never come back.

But you haven’t been to Thailand unless you’ve ridden in one.  The drivers in Bangkok are certifiably insane–and they have uncanny tolerance of their fellow drivers.  It is commonplace to see people driving down the wrong way, people turning across multiple lanes of traffic, as well as tuk-tuks, cars and taxis squeezing past each other at all times.  I never did see a derogatory gesture, or any horn-honking at these sorts of ‘dangerous’ activities–ones that would likely get you shot in the United States.  That being said, the one completely, utterly, unforgivable sin of driving in Bangkok is not leaving the stop line at the exact moment the lights turn green.  Cars behind assault those ahead with a cacophony of horns at the slightest delay.  Hilarious.

Food in Bangkok is varied, and of good quality.  Frankly the best food was sold by these street vendors which will make you a dish of Phad Thai for 40 baht (about $1).  All kinds of fruit, banana pancakes, skewered meats, stir fried dishes, sausages, are available.  I was hoping to see a bug/insect vendor, and sure enough I found one.  They have grasshoppers almost the size of a chicken wing, as well as scorpions, beetles, grubs and cockroaches.  I thought that I’d try one, but chickened out (actually literally went and had chicken instead!).  Maybe I will work up my courage when I’m back in the city?

I did get fitted for custom made suit, a couple sport jackets and some shirts.  I think (actually I know now) that I paid too much–my negotiation skills are not quite perfect.  I can’t quite recommend the experience, at least until you’ve been accustomed to negotiating, due to the high pressure sales tactics that continue even after you’ve bought your first suit.   One place I was happy with until they tried to sell me more stuff when I came back for second fitting.

I did go see a Muay Thai fight, which was cool.  Tickets where more than I was expecting, and no haggling.  In retrospect I think I’d have waited to see a fight in Chiang Mai which is about 1/4 of the cost.

I went to a couple of Wats: Wat Pro (reclining Buddha), Wat Phra Kaeo (emerald Buddha) and the Grand Palace–which are just too amazing to describe, and I suspect that photos won’t do justice either.  At Wat Pro the have this gilded Buddha image (reclining Buddha), 50 meters long.  Imagine a gold Statue of Liberty laying down, but inside a building.  Crazy!

Several of the Wats are under repair, and they let you sign the underside of the roof tiles.  I thought it was kinda cool knowing that my name is on one of the tiles that will hopefully be around for hundreds and thousands more years.

Even though I was only in Bangkok for a few days, I was looking forward to getting away from the bustle of the big city.  Went to the train station to catch an overnight sleeper train to Chiang Mai.  Was relatively comfortable, and was a nice experience to wake up and watch countryside out the windows.

Saw a truly surreal sight at the airport.  I was having dinner and right at 6pm a klaxon/alarm sounded and everyone stood up in unison (most were sitting on the floor).  Foreigners (and myself) were looking around wondering what was going on when music started to play.  At this point police officers start running around blowing whistles at anyone who hasn’t stood up (Thais and foreigners both).  I guess they do this mandatory national anthem thing every day!  I found it very bemusing.

Because my train was at 7:30p and checkout was at 11:00a I spent the whole day properly backpacking to the sights.  In the heat and under the weight I was wilting pretty bad, and was very tired and extremely sore when I arrived at the train station.  After dinner I decided to visit the Thai massage shop at the station.  I frankly wonder the magnitude of pain a 100 lb Thai woman can inflict on a person when they are actually angry and not being paid for their services.  I was pushed, prodded, stretched in every which way–in fact it was so intense and I so unprepared that I was actually unable to stand for a full 5 minutes after the massage was done.  By all means it was exactly what I needed, but I think it something of an ‘advanced’ massage.  Even though it was fairly traumatic for a first-timer, I did feel pretty good afterward, and I think I may partake in few more sessions before the trip is out.

Off now to get some lunch in Chiang Mai, and the start of a new adventure.